Dear Riza,
by dream.love.live
Summary: Sequel to dear Colonel...Roy writes back! He is mad or sad?


_Dear Riza,_

_I wish to thank __you for the letter that you sent me. You may not realize it, but you helped me. I want to say thank you for helping me preventing the leaving of everyone in the office. If it hadn't been for you I would be all alone today. You were right in you letter I was being a selfish bastard. I am not anymore. _

_If you thought that I would ignore your letter you were also wrong. If you thought that I wouldn't notice you're leaving, yet again you were wrong. I have to admit that I did see it coming. You leaving was one of my biggest nightmares. I always thought that you were an idiot for sticking around me and putting up with me. I knew that, eventually, one day you would see that and you would leave. I have dreaded that day for a long time, but when it didn't come I began to take you for granted. You mean a lot to me Riza, even If you seem to think otherwise._

_I'll admit that I usually think everything is my fault, even though I know it is not. When Maes died I kept telling myself: "Why him and not me?" I thought I wasn't good enough, I never did. On his grave I swore to avenge him and reach my goal of being at the top. I avenged him by killing Furher Bradley and I reached my goal of being at the top, yesterday I was officially named Furher. I wish you could have been there to see me and congratulate me. On your father's grave I swore to only use his alchemy for good, I also promised to protect you with my life. I wish to continue using the flame alchemy but if you do not want me to, than I won't. I respect you and your family to highly to make you unhappy. Even if it seems I was the cause of your sorrow for the past years…_

_If you are wondering how this letter got to you, I gave it to Edward who than promised to give it to Winry. Just in case you were wondering the brothers came back about a week after you left. You can imagine the surprise we had when we saw them. Anyway this is a subject for another time._

_You kept telling me in your letter that you thought I was a bad person and that I didn't have a heart. But you should know that it's not true, I do have a heart. The proof is that I felt it shattered when you left. You were my best-friend, I took you for granted and I regret that everyday since your departure._

_I keep playing the last time I saw you in my mind. I thought you had been crying, you told me no and you left saying that you had something important to do. Now, how I wish I would have done what my heart was telling me to do, but my brain refused. I wanted to stand up, walk up to you and hold you in my arms and telling you that I never wanted you to leave me._

_You're wrong when you say you were foolish to love me, because it was me who was foolish not to show you that I loved you as well. I used the past tense because during the years I have come to know you, I always thought that I had no chance with you whatsoever and that I shouldn't try. So I hid my feelings until they were hidden even from me. I kept trying to convince myself that I didn't love you; I regret this now more than ever. How everything could have been different!!! For starters I wouldn't be writing you this letter because I would have never let you out of my sight. _

_I want you to know that I will never end my search to find you. Wherever you are I hope that one day I will succeed in making you stay by my side for the rest of __our__ lives. I realize that you probably weren't waiting for a letter like this, maybe you even weren't waiting for a letter at all! Maybe you though that I would be angry at you. I want you to know that the only reason I'm angry is because you never told me. But for the most part I'm angry at myself for being such an arrogant bastard._

_There is two things that alchemy cannot do: 1- Bring dead persons back to life and 2- Turn back time. I never understood why those things were undoable (sp?). Now I understand why, thanks to you, because if you could do those things then you would never learn from your mistakes. I changed again, because I wanted to. I'm back at being the person I was before the homunculi affair began. _

_I wish you were here; I need to see you, hear your voice, and see your smile and those amazing eyes of yours. I simply need to be with you. Please come back, know that if you don't I'll still search for you. One day, maybe we'll be friends again and even more._

_I miss you,_

_Always Yours,_

_Furher Roy Mustang_

_P.S Just for your information the first thing I did when I became Furher was to remove the rule in the military that people should not have a relationship with co-workers( a lot of couples were discovered, you'd be surprise!)…..just wanted to let you know……_


End file.
